As of late I have been plagued with blog block. I would come up with a really catchy title and nothing much to go with it, or, more commonly, I would read one or more of the blogs I follow and hope for some sort of inspiration from them. That didn’t happen.
But, as it always does, life happens in its own weird and wonderful way. In the past week I have received an unexpected wedding invite in the mail, good friends of mine got engaged, and I overheard part of a conversation that included the phrase “he’s my soulmate”. One may think that would send me off into a blissful blog about the beauty of finding that one true love but if you know me well you know better.
I HATE the term “soulmate” and I always have. First of all, I find it ridiculous that of the 6 billion people on this planet there is one and only one person that you can be truly happy with. What if you live in Boston but your soulmate lives in Bejing? Oddly, it never seems to work that way. Nope, all of our soulmates live in the same general area as us. Amazing!
Secondly, the term “soulmate” is often used to excuse otherwise inexcusable behavior such as cheating on one’s current spouse. That is not OK. Period.
Third, the idea of a “soulmate” can be crippling. We have all at one time or another sat back and thought sadly about The One That Got Away and wondered how much better/different/etc our lives would be if only we had done things differently. But if you subscribe to the notion that person was your “soulmate” then what’s the use of going on? You will never be happy! You might as well jump off a bridge!
Don’t get me wrong- I love love and I love marriage. I have a wonderful husband who has truly seen me at my absolute worst and managed to fall in love with me anyway. He is my rock and my best friend and I could not be happier. My parents have been married for 41 years and are still very much in love. My 2 sets of grandparents had very happy marriages as well- one for 40 plus years and one for 63 years until they were parted by death. Love IS a beautiful thing and is something to celebrate and cherish when you find it. But let’s put the “soulmate” idea to rest shall we?